Wrestling

I know you think I write these devotionals every day for you. You are only partially correct. Some days I write for me and bring you along for the ride.   Writing is how I think and pray and wrestle things out. Today is one of those days. I shared with you earlier that my “word” for the year is “gentle.”  I believe that God is imprinting that word on my heart because I’m in a situation where gentleness is needed for the best outcome.

Gentleness seems so easy, the word even sounds simple as it rolls off my tongue. But it isn’t. Especially when I am tired. And I am tired. Inside and out. When I’m tired the “natural me” comes out. She is petulant and irritable. She wants her way. She grumbles. A lot. She is everything but gentle. And she is awake this morning.

The Lord reminded me of my word through His Word. “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love” (Eph 4:2). Yes Lord, I hear You. Every one of those descriptions is counter to my natural self. I cannot produce them on my own. But they are the very character of Christ whom I claim to follow. One word, in particular, caught my attention: “completely.” That word means “all, each, every.” In every situation, with every person, at all times be humble and gentle and patient and forbearing and loving. Even when I’m tired. Even with people who are unfair and uncooperative. Even when I don’t want to be. Especially when I don’t want to be.

I told you, I’m wrestling this out this morning and so I asked God, “How?” “How do I do this when I’m tired and people are making life hard?” Do you know what He didn’t say? He didn’t say, “I’ll make them more agreeable.” He didn’t say, “I’ll change your situation.” He didn’t say, “I’ll make this easier for you.” The Spirit literally took my eyes across the page of my open Bible to another verse: “For this reason, I kneel before the Father . . .” (3:14). He said, “Humble yourself before  me and ask for my help.” So I will as soon as I sign off. From one wrestler to another, maybe you need to as well Beloved.

I Can’t . . . But I Know Who Will

In our Scripture writing group, we are working our way through Genesis, specifically the story of Joseph. You know the kid who was sold to slave traders by his brothers, then to a powerful man in Egypt whose wife accused him of attempted rape and he was thrown in prison. While there, he correctly interpreted two of his prison mates’ dreams. When Pharaoh had a dream of his own two years later one of the men suggested Joseph could interpret the dream. He was brought before the highest man in the land who insisted that the prisoner do the same for him. Joseph’s reply is resonating deep within my soul this morning. “I cannot do it,” Joseph replied to Pharaoh, “but God will give Pharaoh the answer he desires” (Gen 41:16).

And that is the story of my life: “I cannot . . . but God will.”  I cannot save myself . . . but God will.  I cannot make a masterpiece out of the mess of my life . . . but God will. I cannot heal my broken heart . . . but God will. I cannot love others who have hurt me . . . but God will. I cannot speak wisdom and truth . . . but God will. I cannot produce the fruit of the Spirit . . . but God will. I cannot be strong in my weakness . . . but God will. I cannot be the wife, mother, grandmother, employee, friend, teacher, and writer that I was created to be . . . but God will.

I hear echoes of Jesus’ words in John 5:19: “I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by Himself . . .” If Jesus can do nothing by Himself then I should not be ashamed that I can’t either.  It’s what made Jesus human – He had to rely on His Father – just like me.

In this culture where all of our focus is on me, myself, and I, it’s time we shift our attention from what we can’t do and start declaring what God can – and will – do. And of all the things that God will do, the one I count on the most is that God will be faithful. He knows that I am fallible, He knows that I get weary and my shoulders are not strong enough to carry all my burdens. In all the things that I cannot do, God will be faithful to do it. In me. Through me. Despite me. And He will do the same for you. You cannot do it, Beloved . . . but God will.

Do It Anyway

Eric Liddell served as a missionary in China
and died in a Japanese internment camp at age 43.

Yesterday I wrote about how Moses (and I) argued with God about his qualifications for service. God said, “I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt” (Ex 3:10). Moses replied, “Who am I that I should go to Pharoah and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” (v. 11). And God says something akin to, “It doesn’t matter who you are because I will be with you” (v. 12, paraphrased). Now that should have been enough to stop all of Moses’ arguments, but it isn’t. He said, “What if they don’t believe me?” (4:1). And God empowered him to do signs that validate his message. “But, Lord, I’m not an eloquent speaker – I stutter” (v. 10) To which God says, “I know. I put that tongue in your mouth. But I’m going to help you and teach you what to say and how to say it” (vs. 11-12, paraphrased).

Every time I read this passage I am reminded of when God called me to teach His Word. I was terrified. I hate being the center of attention, probably because as a kid anytime my peers noticed me it was to pick on and bully me. I learned to stay as quiet as possible and even wore drab colors so I didn’t stand out. No Lord, do not put me in front of a group of people. The last time that happened – in Mrs. Faust’s 6th grade English class – I wet my pants. In front of the whole class. Someone reminded me of that when we lined up for our high school graduation.

I said, “I’m a middle-aged woman from the deep south. Nobody’s going to listen to me.” And God said, “I know who you are and how old you are. I also know you love to talk. I made you a chatterbox for a reason. I will be with you. I will help you. I will train you. I will speak through you.” And He has been faithful to His promise. His calling is my Joy.

Eric Liddell, the Scottish Olympic runner and devout Christian once said, “God made me fast. And when I run, I feel His pleasure.” God gave me a love for words and when I write and teach, I feel His pleasure. I don’t know what He has called you to do, but I’ll bet it scares you. And it should – because it’s a God-sized calling. But do it anyway because He will be with you every step of the way. And when you do Beloved, you will feel His pleasure.

The God of the Bible

We’re New Testament Christians – why should we read the Old Testament? What good does it do me to study old laws and rituals? Why should I learn about people so far removed from my own life? Because we don’t study the Bible to learn about laws and rituals and long-dead people – we study the Bible to learn about and draw hope from God. I am in a group that is writing through the Bible, we’ve been mired in Job for months. Lots of misery and grumbling and arguing. But by slowing down the pace and paying attention to the text, we’ve come to understand Job – and God – from a whole new perspective.

Paul said, “Everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope” (Romans 15:4). He’s talking about the Old Testament. When I am discouraged, I go to the stories of God’s deliverance in Exodus. When my life has fallen apart I turn to Nehemiah where God enabled His people to rebuild the broken-down walls. When I face a frightening situation Esther is my go-to book as I remember how God rescued His people. And when the world looms dark and evil, I turn to Daniel and witness God’s sovereign control over human events.

The Old Testament is filled with evidence of God’s power, purpose, love, and faithfulness. The same power, purpose, love, and faithfulness is found in the New Testament and in my life two-thousand plus years later. In the Old Testament, I find the God who delivered Israel, rebuilt Jerusalem, and rescued the Jews. In the New Testament, I see the same God who delivered mankind, broke the bonds of sin and death, and changed the world. He is the same God I call to in this present season of struggle. I know He is able to do for me today all that He did then. I put my name in those verses of rescue and promise and the God of the Hebrew people, of Nehemiah, Esther, and Daniel becomes the God of Dorcas Elizabeth. He hasn’t forgotten how to rescue and restore. His power hasn’t diminished one bit. This God is your God too if you have trusted in Jesus. Beloved, get to know the God of the whole Bible. Get to know the God of your life.

Are You Paying Attention?

This morning I very quickly typed in my laptop’s password – maybe a little too quickly because it was wrong. I tried again and still messed it up. I tried a third time, slowly, paying careful attention to the keys I was hitting. And I got it right that time. God has been impressing those two words on my heart a lot in the past several years. “Pay attention.” In so many areas of my life, I need to pay attention. In my job, at home, in my relationships, in my schoolwork, and in my ministry. And with my granddaughter. It’s not enough to sit in the same room with her and watch TV or scroll through my phone while she plays. No – she wants Nana’s full attention. And I give it to her gladly because building a block castle, rolling the ball across the floor, or helping her wrap up her baby doll is better than anything on TV or my phone.

My password debacle made me think of the discipline several of us are doing, writing out small portions of Scripture every day to eventually write through the entire Bible. We’ve all noted how much we’re discovering because writing forces us to pay attention to every word. For instance, as we’re writing through Job we’re seeing little glimpses – and a few bold declarations – about Jesus that we never noticed before. On the surface, Job is a depressing book and we tend to want to get through it as quickly as possible. But it looks so different at a slower pace.

Now I had a different direction in mind for this devotional and the Spirit just completely re-routed it. So here goes. He pointed out just now John’s proclamation that “the Word was with God, and the Word was God” (John 1:1) We know that “the Word” was Jesus (v. 14). By paying attention to every word of the Word, I am paying attention to Jesus. I can’t think of anything better to give my attention to. Mind you, I’m not suggesting that you have to take pen to paper and write out every word in the Bible, (but if you want to, I’ll post a link to our group in the comments) – but I am saying that taking the Bible – taking the Word – at a slower pace allows you to see things you’ve never seen before.

Beloved, what are you missing? What do you want to see? How might it change your life if you paid attention to the Word – and the Word made flesh?

In the Morning . . .

My alarm goes off at 4:30 (yes a.m.) and after a shower and a steaming cup of life elixir, I am at my desk, ready to dig in and get all spiritual. I open my laptop and see that Facebook says I have notifications – I’ll just check those real quick to see if I need to respond to anyone and see who is having a birthday. I’d also better check the weather to see how I should dress today then I’ll get back to my quiet time But first I need to post the Scripture we’re writing today.  Oh, a friend is asking for prayer. I need to respond to her. And this looks like a good article. Oops, look at the time, I’ve just wasted 20 minutes! I need to get to writing.

I take the responsibility of writing a devotional every day very much to heart. (There have been a few mornings that a little girl needed her Nana and I didn’t get to the devotional.) I get in the Word and start to study, then with fingers on the keyboard, the Word and the Spirit speak and I type. I post the day’s devotional to Facebook and to my blog. Now I have just enough time to fix some breakfast and finish getting ready for work.  But wait. Something is missing. When did I take the time to pray? I didn’t.

With all the things I try to accomplish every morning – shower, feed the cat, clean up after midnight kitchen raids, study, write Scripture, write a devotional, eat breakfast, make lunch, and get out the door and off to work – prayer is too often a casualty of busyness and – let’s be honest – distractions. I know the power of prayer, yet I often fail to make time for it. So I decided to do just that – make time for it. I set my alarm for 4:00. Yes a.m. And to remind me that prayer is the priority, I made a lock screen for my laptop that I see before I can log on. 

David said, “In the morning, O Lord, You hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation” (Ps 5:3). I realize that God cannot hear my voice in the morning if I’m not praying. I don’t want to miss this precious time. Beloved, have you been with the Lord yet?

This is Why I Write

See the source image

“Whatever I tell you in the dark, speak in the light; what is whispered in your ear, proclaim from the roofs” (Matthew 10:27).

The truth is, what you see in me – or read in my words – is not all there is.  I may look wise and together on paper, but it’s not the full picture.  I wrestle daily with depression; it has been my constant companion since I was very young.  It has taken me to some deep, gloomy places.  It has cost me a great deal in my relationships, health, time, money, and hopes, and dreams.   I’ve tried many things to keep it at bay. Medication, Scripture, and prayer have all been effective and helpful tools. But they haven’t made it completely go away. 

Do I really believe the things I write about God breaking through despair to bring hope?  Yes – because those are the very same words that God speaks to me – His continual stream of goodness and inspiration that keeps my feet steady and my head lifted.  They are His constant reminders of love flowing through His Word and His Spirit and shining in my darkness.  He knows me.  He knows that I can’t make it one day without the hope He gives.  So He speaks to me.

Then He tells me to speak to you.  Because He knows you too.  He knows that some days are so hard you don’t even want to get out of bed.  He knows that you are lonely, grieving, hurting, fearful.  He knows that you have been disappointed, forgotten, rejected, passed over – and so He tells me, “Take the words that have spoken over you and speak it over them.”  That is why I write.  It’s so you can grab onto the same lifeline God threw out to me.  Because I can’t keep this comfort and encouragement to myself – it’s much too big and wonderful for just me.  It’s for you too.  It’s a warm blanket we can share in a cold world.  It’s a quilt of encouragement

Beloved, come join me in the sweet, blessed comfort of our Heavenly Father.  Hear His words of hope, peace, encouragement, and Joy.  Let the warmth of His love wash over you.  We’re in this together – you and I – and the God of Heaven and Earth.  We’re gonna make it—He told me so—and then He told me to tell you.

Do You Measure Up?

When I post my devotionals every morning to this blog, I have to go into the admin page. This page contains a bar graph showing how many people have visited each day.  I try not to look because I used to get really excited when the bar went high and really discouraged by low numbers, thinking I should just quit since no one wants to read what I’m writing. The ego is a very fickle thing, even for people in ministry. Yesterday I noticed out of the corner of my eye that the bar graph was all the way to the top of the chart. Wow! That’s gotta be some pretty high numbers. So I looked. And sure enough, I had hit at or near the highest line on the chart. The number thirty. The graph adjusts itself based on the past ten days. Well, that’s kind of deflating.

But it made me think about a verse in one of Paul’s letters: “We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves.  When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise” (2 Corin. 10:12). In the church, we tend to compare ourselves with others – discouraged (or jealous) when we don’t measure up to the most “devout saints” and a bit smug when we think we are more righteous than someone who struggles with things we don’t. Paul said such comparisons are not serving the Body. Because there is only one standard to measure up to – that of Jesus.

I may think I am holier-than-thou, but am I as holy as Jesus? You may consider a woman’s outfit inappropriate for church, but are you wearing robes of righteousness? I may not string together a chain of profanities, but are my words always light and life? Your faith may be a little stronger than mine, but can you go willingly to the cross like Jesus? For my sins?

We are all struggling in this life. None of us will reach the top of the bar like Jesus – at least not this side of heaven. Instead of measuring ourselves against other fallible human beings, we need to make Jesus our only goal. Beloved, I am not better than you and you are not better than me, but we can help each other be more like Jesus. I’m willing – are you?

Proofreading Your Life

See the source image

My late brother, who was a published author, recommended Grammarly to me and it has been invaluable for helping me in my writing both for school and for ministry. It alerts me to misspelled words, incorrect syntax, better word options, poor grammar, incorrect punctuation, and – my most frequent error, too, many, commas. When I open it with my Word document, it sits on the right-hand side of my screen and constantly checks my work. When I make an error, it comes to life with colored lines and warnings about what I’ve done wrong. So far it has caught 13 mistakes in this devotional (*I’m updating this number as I’m writing). Yet for all its benefit and wise advice, it has one flaw – it won’t make the corrections for me. It finds my problems and makes suggestions but leaves the choice to make the changes up to me.

I think you know where I’m going with this. God has given us a powerful tool for our lives: His Word. The Bible can point to the problems in our lives and give us wise counsel for fixing the problem, but it is up to you and me to make the change. Two things can cause Grammarly not to do its job. I can neglect to turn it on and never see the issues in my document, or I can ignore it – which I do when I like the word I’ve chosen and don’t want to change it. Likewise, if we never bother to read God’s Word, we will never recognize what is wrong in our lives. Or, we just ignore what God said because – let’s be honest – we like the sinful choice we’ve made and we have no desire to change.

James said, “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says” (James 1:22). He compared the person who hears, then disregards the Word to someone who looks at his reflection in a mirror and then forgets what he saw when he walks away. All through his letter, James emphasized the hearing and the doing of the Word. Reading the Bible is really useless if you and I aren’t going to obey it. (Note: Grammarly suggested I take out the “really,” but I am ignoring that suggestion because I want the emphasis.)

Beloved, the Bible is the living Word of the living God and it has great power to transform your life – if you will read it and heed it. It’s a good thing to be a good writer, but it’s eternally better to be an obedient doer of the Word of God.

Be an Encourager

See the source image

The book of Haggai has only 2 chapters and 38 verses – but they pack a punch. Haggai prophesied after the Israelites were released from Babylon and returned home to find Jerusalem in shambles. The protective wall was broken down.  Their homes were destroyed. The Temple of God was a pile of rubble. The work of restoring the temple was started then stopped because of threats and intimidation by enemy nations. They instead focused their efforts on rebuilding their own homes, and once comfortable and unwilling to resist the harassment of their enemies, they became lethargic and abandoned the Temple work. Does any of that sound familiar? On a national scale, it describes the United States to a T. On a personal level it’s like I’m looking in a mirror.

The people were discouraged. They had endured seventy years in captivity and faced destruction when they finally came home. They were also under attack. The Samaritans were fighting against them with threats and political maneuvering. (Hmmm.) Enter Haggai who delivered a word of encouragement. He said that The Spirit of the Lord remained with them (2:4-5). He declared, “in this place I will grant peace” (2:9) He said, “From this day on, I will bless you” (2:19).

The world needs men and women of godly courage to speak both truth and hope. I know I need it. I suspect you do too. I’m going to let you in on a little secret. It’s been a hard year for me and I don’t usually often sit down to this laptop every morning brimming over with holy confidence.  I have to get in the Word and let God speak to me through His Spirit. As I write these devotionals for you, I am encouraged. I find hope. Friend, the best medicine for discouragement is to let God encourage others through you. Water can’t flow through a pipe without also getting the pipe wet. Beloved, who in your life needs a word of  hope?