Bullseye

It was my verse through seven years of infertility. It has been my verse through hard times of struggle, sadness, disappointment, and longing. It is my verse now in this season of anxiety and uncertainty and heartache. “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when dreams come true at last there is life and Joy” (Prov. 13:12 TLB).

Hope, on its own, implies delay; the word means to wait for, to be patient. Paul wrote, “Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait patiently for it” (Rom 8:24-25). But it’s more than waiting. It also means to expect. To borrow from Paul; who hopes for what she doesn’t think will ever happen? Hope is patient expectation rooted in trust. But there’s one more word connected to hope: pain. I’ll bet somebody is shaking their head. Waiting can be painful. Just ask me thirty-something years ago in that season of waiting for God to bless us with a baby. I trusted God, but my empty arms ached.

But this verse adds another layer: Hope deferred . . . This means hope dragged along. To the waiting, we add tension. One definition means “to draw the bow” and it reminded me of taking archery in high school. First I would seat the arrow in the bow and find my target. I fixed my sights on the bullseye, lifted the bow into firing position, and pulled the arrow back, stretching the bowstring taut. In the moment between setting the arrow and letting go, there was incredible tension in the string and in my arm. We had to wait until the instructor gave the firing order. If that order was delayed, my arm would start to ache and tremble. But I had to hold my position. If I dropped my bow, I might miss the call. If I lost my visual focus, I would lose the target. Hope deferred often causes pain and we may tremble in the waiting, but we do not lower our bow – or our shield of faith. We do not take our eyes off the target – the faithfulness of God.

This verse says we may even become heartsick – grieved and weary. We may feel like all we do is beg God to act. Believe me, I’m there. “But” – oh how I love the “buts” in the Bible – “when dreams come true at last there is life and Joy” You know what jumps out at me? “When” not “if.” When the arrow hits the target dead center. When God comes through. And I’m counting on God to come through. Beloved, take up your position, don’t drop your faith, and keep your eyes on the Lord. When. Not if.

Waiting on God

Psalm 106 is a “Salvation History Psalm” – a retelling of God rescuing His people from slavery in Egypt.  You know the story: God brought the Israelites out of bondage and led them to the edge of the Red Sea – impassable waters in front of them and their enemy close on their heels.  He made a way through the sea and when the last Israelite foot cleared the dry sea bed, He closed in the walls of water on Pharoah and His army.  The Scripture says, “Then [the Israelites] believed His promises and sang His praise” (v. 12).  Wouldn’t you?  If God had done a miraculous thing for you, wouldn’t you believe?  Wouldn’t you sing a chorus of, “You’re a good, good, Father!”?

But wait. The next verse says: “But they soon forgot what He had done and did not wait for His plan to unfold” (v. 13).  And they grumbled. On the heels of the Red Sea miracle. Remember the celebration in verse 12? Check out verses 24-25: “They did not believe His promise. They grumbled in their tents and did not obey the Lord.” Makes me want to shake my head.  They failed to trust God – the same God who had rescued them in dramatic fashion just a few weeks before.

But, let’s be honest here, don’t you and I do the same thing?  God works powerfully on our behalf and we celebrate and sing His praises and the next time we face a challenge, we worry.  We forget what God did and focus on the new hardship as if God used it all up on the first one.  Or maybe that’s just me. 

I wrote in the margin: “Lord, I want to always believe Your promises and sing Your praises while I am still waiting.”  I am there right now – waiting. And trusting.  And reminding myself of His powerful acts of the past, how he made a way where I couldn’t see a way. How He softened hard hearts. How he rescued someone I love. And I know He will do it again. So I’m gonna sing His praises now, during the crisis, not just after. 

Have you forgotten His goodness to you?  The God who was faithful yesterday will not be unfaithful today. He is the same good Father who carried you through the last storm – and He will not abandon you now.  Beloved, come sit here with me, and let’s praise the Lord while we wait.

Joy!

One day the Lord will make it all right again. One day wickedness and evil will be cast away and righteousness and holiness will rule. One day God will pave “the Way of Holiness” where only the redeemed will walk (Is 35:8, 9). One day blind eyes will see, deaf ears will hear, the lame will leap, and the mute will shout for Joy” (v. 5-6). One day “sorrow and sighing will flee away and gladness and Joy will overtake [us]” (v. 10). One day all of God’s creation will “burst into bloom; it will rejoice greatly and shout for Joy” (v. 2).

Did you notice all the Joy? It is the theme of this Psalm. It is the promise of God for eternity “Everlasting Joy will crown [our] heads” (v. 10). Not a “good days” kind of happiness. Not warm fuzzies because you got flowers at work. Not even the feeling you had on your wedding day or the birth of your children. Because we know that bad days will still happen. Those pretty flowers will wither away soon. Your spouse will disappoint you, even make you angry, and your kid will have an epic meltdown. The kind of Joy Isaiah spoke of doesn’t come from circumstances, your family’s behavior, or a day at the beach. This Joy is the theme of heaven.

Heavenly Joy sounds wonderful. But we’re not there yet. What do we do while we’re still here on earth? “Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way; say to those with fearful hearts, ‘Be strong, do not fear; your God will come . . . He will come to save you’” (v. 3-4). We strengthen and steady ourselves and encourage one another. We keep our focus on the Lord and remember His faithfulness, power, and love. We soak up His Word. We bring our concerns to Him in prayer. And we come together to lift one another up with the hope of His return.

I’ve had to take my own advice this week. Some important things are out of my hands and I’ve had to constantly cry out to God, lay my anxiety down, and mentally redirect my thoughts. And I’ve had good sisters in the faith praying and encouraging me. Yes, everlasting Joy is our promise. But hope is our strength as we wait. I’ll tell you what I’ve told myself all week: God. Will. Not. Fail. You. Be encouraged. Beloved. Your God will come.

God Loves You

She looked at my t-shirt and snorted. “Yeah, I know, ‘God loves me.’ But He’s way up in heaven and I am down here on this miserable earth. He’s too far away to care about me or do anything for me.” She walked away before I could answer, but she left me thinking about what I would have said.

I would tell her about Psalm 107. The Psalmist starts by saying, “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever” (v. 1). Then he sets up several examples: People with no place to go, wandering hungry and thirsty; but when “they cried out to the Lord, He delivered them” and brought them to a place to call home (vs. 4-9). Prisoners who were suffering for their sin and rejection of God, who cried out to the Lord, and “He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom and broke away their chains” (vs 10-16). People whose foolishness and rebellion brought them great affliction to the point of death, still, when they cried out to the Lord, “He sent for His Word and healed them; He rescued them from the grave (vs. 17-22).

Then there were the ones who were in grave danger in a storm at sea and “at their wits’ end” (can you relate?). You know the next line, when they cried out the Lord stilled the storm and hushed the waves and brought them safely to shore (vs. 23-32). He caused rivers and springs to appear in the desert, created a lush and fruitful land, and blessed and multiplied His people. And when they rebelled, He disciplined them. But then He “lifted the needy out of their affliction” – affliction they brought on themselves – and blessed them again (vs. 33-42).

With every situation, the Psalmist punctuates his story with the words: “Let them give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love and His wonderful deeds for men” (vs. 8, 15, 21, and 31).  I wish I could tell her that God’s love is not a far-flung concept, but a reality that is seen and felt in the lives of those who trust and cry out to Him. I would share the Psalmist’s last words: “consider the great love of the Lord” (v. 43), and then I would tell her about Jesus. Maybe you are the one who doubts the love and care of God. Oh, Beloved, His eye is on you and He is as near as a whispered prayer.

The Rest of the Story

I’m living in the middle of a story that is causing me a lot of anxiety. I can’t see what is happening, I have no control over the particulars. I don’t know how this will end – or when. I am keeping an open prayer line to God and running to it often when panic wants to raise its ugly head. Somebody reading this can relate. I know a father with a demon-possessed son could too.  Please take a moment and read Mark 9:17-27 to get the scope of the story.

When we read accounts in the Bible today, as Paul Harvey said, we know “the rest of the story.”  But the people in the story didn’t.  Think about this from the father’s perspective – in real-time – as he stands before Jesus with pleading eyes, “If you can do anything, take pity on us and help us” (Mark 9:22).  Stay in the moment as we see Jesus turn to the child and speak with authority, “I command you to come out of him and never enter him again” (v. 25).  Watch as “the spirit shrieked, convulsed him violently and came out” (v. 26)” But wait, what did Jesus do?  The boy looks dead – like a corpse!  The father brought his boy to Jesus and Jesus made everything worse.

Now, freeze the scene right here and consider this: just as the father lived out his story in real-time, you and I are also living out our story without the advantage of a written script that tells us how it all ends.  All we know is, right now, at this moment, the anxiety is high.

“But Jesus . . .” these are the most precious words in the Bible to me.  “But Jesus took [the boy] by the hand and lifted him to his feet” v. 27).  Wonder of wonders, the boy is not dead – he is alive – and healed!  He runs into his father’s arms with a smile of triumph. His father bends to kiss his son’s head with a look of amazement and Joy.

May I remind you not to give up on Jesus?  He can see the end from the middle. That moment when all seems lost, just as it was for this father, might be the moment just before all is found. Bring your need to Jesus, give Him room to work, and don’t lose hope. Beloved, your story isn’t over yet.

Lean on God

My son called us early this morning fully dressed in his army uniform and hat with an anxious expression on his face. I remember that look well. I saw it on his first day of school. I saw it when he was a teenager and had to explain his actions to a police officer. I saw it when he faced things that were scary and unknown. That look of “I don’t know if I can do this.” He’s a grown man, but the boy was there on the screen, wiping away a tear from his eye. He starts the full run of basic combat training. It’s going to be hard. They will break him. The worst part, he said, is he won’t be allowed to call home for the first couple of weeks. Talking to his wife and daughter and mom has gotten him through. But we won’t have us for a while.

This will be the hardest thing he’s ever done, and he’s overwhelmed. Maybe you understand. You might be in the middle of the hardest thing you’ve ever faced right now and you don’t know how you will make it. I will tell you the same thing I told him. This is when you lean hard on God. When grief and sorrow overwhelm you, lean on God. When your body is racked with pain and fever, lean on God. When you walk out of your workplace with your possessions in a box, when the gas tank, the pantry, and your purse are empty, when the one who vowed to love you walks away, when you sit helplessly beside your loved one’s hospital bed . . . lean on God. When you head off to boot camp, lean on God. And when my son wipes away tears of anxiety 425 miles away, I’ve got to lean on God too.

What does that look like? A lot of prayer. A lot of time in the Word of God. And more prayer. And when the wave of anxiety or depression or anger or grief hits I pray more and read more and lean more. Because God is faithful. Every scenario I mentioned, I’ve lived through – or I should say God carried me through. He was with me in every one. He was my strength and my comfort. He was my hope and my peace. And now, I am entrusting my son into His hands. I reminded Troy of that before we signed off the call together. I’m reminding myself of that too. Beloved, whatever you face right now, lean hard on God. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart . . .” (Prov. 3:5). You’re in His hands – and there’s no better place to be.

The Most Encouraging Word You’ll Ever Hear

When I sit down at my desk every morning to write I look at my Bible and wonder, “Where do I start?” Every word on every page is important and valuable. It’s hard to pluck a small bit of text out of this wonderful, blessed book. So I ask Him to speak through me because He knows you so well. He knows exactly what you need. He knows me too and He speaks to me as much as He speaks through me.

Today He sent me to 2 Peter 3 – a wonderful word of hope. No, it’s not an “everything’s gonna be all right, just you wait and see” kind of encouragement – it’s better. The context tells us that his readers are under much duress and persecution by “scoffers who come scoffing and following their own evil desires” (v. 3). They deny the existence of God and His work of creation. They “deliberately forget” that He has the authority to judge “ungodly men” (vs. 5-7). They rejected His Word and His people. Sound familiar? Some things never change.

Peter’s audience was growing weary of evil and persecution – just as we are. They wanted to know when God was going to keep His word and pronounce judgment. Then Peter says, “Do not forget this one thing, dear friends . . .” (v. 8). This is the message he knows will reach their minds and their hearts. “The Lord is not slow in keeping His promises . . .” “the day of the Lord will come” (v. 9-10). Make no mistake – God will punish evil. But in His grace, He is giving men time to repent. If you have lost loved ones, that is good news.

Then Peter brings it all back to the Christian – to you and me. In light of God’s faithfulness, “what kind of people ought you to be” (v. 11)? People who “live holy and godly lives” and “look forward to the day of God” (v. 11-12).

The greatest, most encouraging, and hopeful promise I can share is this: Jesus is coming again. No, I mean: JESUS IS COMING AGAIN! He will gather us together and take us home. He will judge all the wickedness and evil that grieves us so. He will make all things right. Just “wait a little longer” (Rev. 6:11), Beloved, and keep your eyes on the eastern sky.

For the Brokenhearted

This one is going to be a little different. My heart is heavy for some people who are grieving today. I want so much to offer a word of comfort, but what do you say to someone who has lost their whole world? We all face sorrow. In the past two years, my brother and my father passed away. I’m sure you also understand the pain of death. I’ve never lost a child – I understand from some of you that it is a crushing kind of grief that never ever goes away.

So, what kind of hope is there for our broken hearts? All have are words – but they are words from the Source of life. They are soft pillows on which to rest your head. They are balm for the aching hole in your heart. They are promises you can lean on when you cannot stand a minute longer.

Like, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted” (Ps. 34:18). When my granddaughter hurts, I hurt. When she cries I run to her and scoop her up in my arms and hold her close. God does much the same for us when our hearts are broken. He draws near to His hurting child so that you can rest your weary head on His big chest and feel His breath ruffle your hair. You might even hear Him singing over you (Zep. 3:17).

When you can’t stop crying, remember that your tears are precious to the Lord. He catches every one and stores them in a bottle like a treasure (Ps 56:8). He promises that one day those tears will turn into songs of Joy (Ps 126:5). And mourning will turn into gladness (Jer. 31:13). The memories that sting your eyes now will bring you sweet delight.

Your heart feels like it’s in a thousand pieces. God will put them all back together and every piece will refract His glory in new and beautiful ways – like the sun shining through a stained-glass window. The world will be in awe of how God glistens through you.

And the sweetest promise of all is that you and I will one day be reunited with our loved ones, never to be apart again. My Mom, Dad, and brother. My dear friend’s husband. Another friend’s sister. Your coworker’s fiancé. My cousin’s son. The neighbor’s wife. Your little girl. They will squeal with delight when they see you at the gate. They will take you by the hand and give you the grand tour of heaven. And you’ll have coffee together every morning and ice cream every night. Forever and ever and ever.

Grief is long and hard, but it isn’t eternal. God will come near to you. He will quiet you with His love (Zeph 3:17). He will put your broken heart back together. He will give you back what you lost. Not just for a moment, but forever. My prayers are with you, Beloved.

Scars

“I was afraid if you saw it, you would run away. I thought if you ever knew you wouldn’t want me anymore” Those are the words of the sweet heroine in a book I read years ago. The bride is crying to her groom because she has revealed an ugly scar on her back from a childhood of abuse. Her husband draws her closer and assures her that this slight imperfection does not diminish his love for her, but makes him want to protect her from further harm. The scene is endearing, but the girl’s words stuck with me. “If you ever knew . . .”

I think that so often when I receive your kind words about my writing and teaching. “If you ever knew . . .” If you knew the places I’ve been, the foolish, sinful things I’ve done, the stupid mistakes I’ve made – I’m not sure you’d ever trust me again. To say that God has done a work of grace in my life is a vast understatement. I understand David’s testimony of praise for the One who “redeems [my] life from the pit and crowns [me] with love and compassion” (Psalm 103:4). I have been in some deep, dark pits. But God . . .

Truth be told, we all have that thing (or several things) that we want to keep well hidden from the world. Maybe it is a physical issue, an emotional matter, a blot in our family history, or a regret from our past – whatever it may be, we believe it marks us as imperfect. Unlovable. Undesirable. So we cover it with make-up or long sleeves – we hide it behind a mask or a brave face. “If you ever knew . . .”

We may be able to hide it from others, but there is One who sees what we try so carefully to conceal. He knows us completely, warts, scars, hang-ups, and all. Nothing is concealed from His all-seeing eyes. That’s a scary thought. Jesus sees you – the real, raw, imperfect you. And yet . . . HIs heart is not repulsed. His eyes are not averted. His love is not diminished. Scars – whether physical, emotional, or spiritual – are nothing new to Him. Beloved, He who bears the scars of thorns and nails and spear understands yours and loves you still.

The Art of Gentleness

I was going in a whole other direction this morning, climbing up on my soapbox with my script in hand. Then the Holy Spirit drew my attention to a small yellow post-it tab peeking out of my Bible. “Hmmm – wonder what you were marking there?” I flipped to the page in Ephesians where I found a verse I had previously underlined: “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (4:32). And I heard very clearly, “Remember Gentleness.” In case you missed it, “Gentle” is my “word for 2023.” Yes, I realize it’s the third time I’ve written about it since the beginning of the year – and it’s only the 25^th of January, but that’s because God keeps bringing it up to me. Probably because I keep dropping the ball.

I’ll be honest, I’ve been chaffing at this call lately. I don’t always want to be patient and kind. I want my way. I want my time to be my own. I want to spend my money on what I want.  I want my priorities to be other people’s priorities. I don’t want to be inconvenienced. I hope that doesn’t make you think less of me, but that’s just my human nature coming out. You’ve got one too, you know.

My verse is sandwiched between a call to “get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger . . .” (v. 31) and the command to “live a life of love . . .” (5:2) This, Paul said, makes us “imitators of God” (5:1). Think about it – God has every right to be angry at us because we are sinners, but He instead offers us forgiveness and love. He is gracious and gentle with us – even though we don’t deserve it. Can we do any less for those who have hurt, used, and offended us?

The culture panders to our human nature. “You don’t have to take that. Put yourself first. Nice guys finish last.”  But God says, “Be gentle. Be gracious and kind and compassionate. Forgive. Be loving. Be like Me.” God keeps bringing to mind Romans 12:10 “Honor one another above yourselves.” What will you choose, Beloved? The world may look down on you for giving yourself away, but you will never be more like God than when you do.